A personal essay from Slater

I spoke to Cheeko about this yesterday afternoon but didn't want to bring it up before, during, or after the raid because there were other things to discuss.

Last Monday I was out in the wilderness with no cell phone signal doing my work thing. When I got back to civilization I had like 10 voicemails waiting for me which is unusual.

The first was from my real estate agent letting me know that an offer I put in on a house the week before was accepted. Huzzah, I bought a house. I got really lucky in that I was able to buy it for well under the asking price and it's in a great neighbourhood with a large lot and lots of fully grown trees. The house itself needs a ton of work though (hence the low price) but I'm looking forward to doing all of the renovations myself and learning about home maintenance. Apartment living has made me sawft.

The remaining voicemails were all from my parents. They were letting me know that my brother had tried to commit suicide on the weekend. So that sort of spoiled my house news. They were flying out to Calgary to see him, deal with things and see how his girlfriend was doing and they wanted to know if I wanted to go with them. I said sure and Tuesday morning I was on my way to Calgary.

My brother has been an alcoholic for many years and he has highs and lows dealing with it. This was a particularly deep low for him as he has taken on a lot of real life stress lately (moved in with his girlfriend who had just bought a house, started his own sub-contracting business, etc.) and I guess he cracked under the stress. He drank a shit ton of alcohol and took a bunch of pills in a shitty motel room as his girlfriend had kicked him out that Friday.

Anyway, we got there, surveyed the situation, made sure his girlfriend was alright, and got him into a hospital for a few weeks while he waits for a spot in rehab to open up. My dad and I flew home on Saturday because we both had to work this week while my mom stayed out there with my brother (she's retired).

My dad stayed with me this weekend because I wanted to go through the new house with him this morning. He knows a ton about home renovation so I wanted to get his opinion on the house and where I should start with my renovations and stuff. He left this morning (my parents live about 750km from me or 470 miles for you Muricans).

So the TL;
DR of this story is that I won't be around much for the next few months. I'll be going back and forth to Calgary a few times over the next few months, both to see my brother and to steal a lot of his furniture since he won't be needing it for a while. I also move into my new house at the end of November and I have a ton of work to do on it before mid-January as I have a friend from Iceland coming to stay with me for a few weeks. At the very least I'd like to get the kitchen, at least one bathroom and a bedroom fully completed in about 6 weeks which will be a huge challenge given the holidays are coming and I'll be spending a few weekends in Calgary.

It is very shitty timing obviously for the guild. If this was 4-6 months ago I would be very worried about the fate of Sadistic but in the last few weeks/months we've picked up a ton of good people and promoted a bunch of solid officers so I'm certain that things will be alright. I have no idea how much time I'll be able to spend in game for the first few months of WoD but it certainly won't be enough to be an effective raid leader, officer, or reliable raider. The stress level of my current RL situation combined with a new tier of raiding, 20 man raids, loot drama, and all of the other stuff that comes with being an officer in a raid guild would probably give me a heart attack at this point.

I'll be there for the raid on Tuesday to close out the tier 14 months after we started SoO (damn you Blizz) and after that I'll be on sporadically. I'll still be checking the forums of course and might be able to help out with any administrative stuff that doesn't need to be dealt with in game. I know we've still got some work to do as far as new recruits go and finalizing our roster for Mythic and making sure everyone is on the same page as far as expectations for WoD raiding and EPGP. WE should try and sort out as much of that as possible this week and have some stuff posted by the end of the weekend.

Feel like I need to sign off with something here but I'm drawing a blank.

TL;
DR: Read my essay! Make me feel like someone reads these things!

Ahhh Slater wall of text. The only person who types messages long enough that they require 2 tl;
dr statements

About 4 years ago I was in such a deep depression that all I could think about was how to kill myself in a way that I would not be a burden on the people that would inevitably have to "
clean"
me up. I kept thinking about how my suicide would affect my kids as they grew up not just without a father but with one that decided to end his life and leave them.

My wife got me to go to a psychiatrist and they put me on klonopin and lithium. About a week later once I got used to the fog of being on these drugs, for the first time in years I saw everything clearly and realized just how fucked up my mental state really was.

The greatest help to me during this time was the love and support of my wife and kids. She didn't judge me or what I was doing she just stood by me and kept me on track.

It won't be easy and I am sure there is lots of emotional strain between you and him but remember one thing. Everything is perception. What to you may seem like something stupid or plain retarded (his addiction to substance) to him is probably the most important thing in his life.

Slater, you will always have a home here. The last couple of years I have grown to respect you as a person and consider myself lucky to have a friend like you. (no homo)


Oh and gratz on the house. " title="Razz" />


Iffi

I love you slater, that is all " title="Smile" />

[quote="
Wreqtangle"
:7026d2k2]I love you slater, that is all " title="Smile" />